Spam and Scams Go Hand in Hand

By Denise Hall (c) 2003


We all know there's been alot of chaos lately about new
anti-Spam laws and honest business owners like you and me
don't want to have our businesses and ezines shut down due
to false complaints. Yet we also know that true Spammers
and Scammers will continue to get away with their crap.

Here's a prime example of both Spam and a scam that I
received in my inbox a few days ago. I've interjected my
own comments in brackets throughout.


"Subject: REPLY URGENT

Dear SIR,

[Since when did I become "SIR?" The last I knew, I was a
female. So if you'd like to propose a joint venture with
me, I'd appreciate at least being called "Ma'am."]

Thanking you so much for taking your time to read my request
mail and your timely response too.

[You're welcome. I needed a good laugh.]

To be candid, we do not know ourselves before this business
that has to do with Trust linking us up. We are strangers
to each other. But I purposely wrote you in faith to
sincerely know if you have the desire and the capability to
do this business with me. I got your contact through the
Internet with the hope that you have the qualities
desirable in such business.

[I know myself, but maybe he doesn't know himself.
Oops, I forgot he's foreign, so that explains the misuse of
certain words that could possibly cause me to misunderstand
this whole business proposal. I'll take that into account
to be sure I understand all the details. After all, he did
write me "in faith to sincerely" find out if I'm a gullible
idiot.]

We are civil servants and not business men, so we have no
particular investment in mind, hence we are equally
requesting you to assist us in this regard as soon as the
money is claimed by you on our behalf.

[Yep, he does think I have "Idiot" written on my forehead
if I really think someone would hand me money for no reason
that I have to claim for someone else. I wonder what the
penalty is for money-laundering in this country? I don't
think I want to find out.]

This business I am asking you into are in two phases:

1. I want you to stand as the beneficiary to this deposited
funds after the legal changes have been made to your names
as the true beneficiary of this funds and you will be
officially informed by the security company about these
changes. This means that you will clear/claim this funds on
my behalf. In my proposal to you I made it clear why I want
you to claim this fund for us.

[Well, which is it? Am I the beneficiary, meaning the money
is mine or do I have to hand it over to this guy since I'm
claiming it on his behalf? I don't think he made it very
clear why I have to claim this fund for him. I'm
beginning to feel like a scapegoat for something.]

2. When you claim this funds, we will invest our own share
of the funds under your total control or advice. I believe
you still recall my reason of soliciting for a foreign
partner like you to handle this on our behalf. Your rewards
for investing this funds for us will be spelt out as we
progress through an agreement.

[Oh, now I get it. I have total control, but the money isn't
mine. However, I do get to tell this guy how to invest it. I
think I'll sell him shares of stock in my company. :) But
since he's foreign, I get the feeling he won't have to do
jail time with me when I get busted for whatever it is he's
proposing. That's OK. I'll get rich from selling him the
shares of stock.]

However, I want to let you know that I will be very happy to
work with you as far as you promise to be honest and
reliable with me over this business. Before we proceed I
will first of all want you to clarify and affirm to the
following points below:

(1) THAT YOU ARE AN HONEST PERSON

(2) THAT YOU WILL NOT CHEAT ME OUT OF THIS PROJECT.

(3) THAT YOU WILL BE WILLING TO WORK WITH ME AS A PARTNER
IN THIS REGARD.

(4) THAT YOU WILL BE WILLING TO MAKE YOUR SELF AVAILABLE
FOR A FACE TO FACE MEETING WITH ME.

(5) THAT YOU WILL BE TOTALLY COMMITTED TO ENSURE AN ABSOLUTE
SUCCESS OF THIS PROJECT.

(6) THAT YOU WILL BE WILLING TO KEEP EVERYTHING RELATING TO
THIS BUSINESS CONFIDENTIAL.

[Of course, I agree to all of his conditions. That's the
type of person I am - honest, hard-working and full of
integrity. Anyone who knows me, knows that. I'm definitely
the gal for this job!]

As soon as I get your confirmations on the above points
mentioned, I will move to the security company for the
necessary changes to your names as the true beneficiary to
this deposited funds, after which you will be contacted by
the security company for an official appointment as regards
the claims of this funds. On my own part, I am assuring you
that this project is 100% hitch free as regards the
processes and the procedures involve, because I have done
my home work very very well. With your genuine commitment,
this project is deemed to be successfully completed within
a couple of days.

[I still don't know what's in it for me. Do I get a cut of
this trust fund, or what? Oh, well, it doesn't matter. He's
notifying the security company to put the funds in my
name. But why is he specifically telling me it's
"hitch-free?" Why wouldn't it be? He must be a great guy to
offer me this deal, right? And he did do his homework if
he picked me for this project.]

Also the following information is required from you:

1.YOUR NAMES AS THEY APPEAR IN YOUR VALUABLE DOCUMENTS eg,
INTERNATIONAL PASSPORT OR DRIVING LICENSE, TO ENABLE THE
PREPARATION OF THE DOCUMENTS COVERING THIS FUND TO BEAR YOUR
NAMES SO AS TO ENABLE YOU TO CLEAR/CLAIM THE FUND AS THE
TRUE BENEFICIARY.

[No problem! I'll send the information immediately. I don't
mind someone stealing my identity so I can have this
wonderful business opportunity. How come he didn't ask for
my social security and bank account numbers, too? Doesn't
the security company need those to do their paperwork
properly?]

2.YOUR CONTACT INFORMATION (TEL AND FAX)TO ENABLE ME AND THE
SECURITY COMPANY ESTABLISH CONTACT WITH YOU .

Please respond urgently as I do not wish to contact another
person until you confirm that you are no longer interested.


[I better jump on this while I have the chance! I wouldn't
want to miss out on having everything I own stolen and my
credit ruined. If I pass it up, he'll ask someone else.]

PLEASE CALL ME TODAY ANY TIME AS SOON AS YOU GET THIS MAIL,
WITH THIS MY PRIVATE TELEPHONE NUMBER 0031-64111xxxx

[I'll call him after I spend all the money I make selling
him stock in my company. I'm sure he'd help me out with
another business opportunity when I'm broke, don't you
think?]

Yours sincerely,

MR. ROBERT ....."

[That's odd. This isn't the name in the "from" field of the
e-mail I received. Who the heck is really offering me this
terrific opportunity? I want to thank the right person.]


Where the heck are those e-mail police when you need them?
This is true Spam and an obvious scam, but no one stopped
it from getting to my inbox.

Maybe someone should forward stuff like this to AOL, Yahoo,
Habeas and other companies who are quick to shut down the
honest business owners, but don't seem to go after the real
Spammers and Scammers.

Spam and Scams seem to go hand in hand on the Internet.
This e-mail is the type that those companies need to get
rid of. So where are they when the real Spam and Scams
surface? Probably enjoying donuts and coffee at the local
donut shop.

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Denise Hall is the owner of Home Business on a Budget which
specializes in tools and resources for your home business
needs. Visit http://www.home-business-on-a-budget.com today.
Get weekly articles, tips, information and resources here:
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